Being in a situation where you need to decide whether to stay or give
up on a troubled marriage is a great dilemma. You are about to make a
crucial decision where the consequences can affect your life for years
or worse, for a lifetime. No one wishes this to happen in their marriage
but if you are in the verge of divorce, there are a lot of questions
that you need to ask yourself. These questions can be very helpful for
you to reflect and think before getting a divorce. So what are the
questions to ask before getting a divorce?
Do you still love your spouse? There are many questions to ask before
getting a divorce and one of them is asking yourself if you still have
strong feelings of love towards your spouse. Love is the main ingredient
in a relationship and if you still love your spouse the relationship is
not hopeless. Due to the demands of married life, the love between
couples could be outshined by overwhelming marital problems. The most
common issue or married couples is the issue about money. When couples
are overwhelmed by financial issues and debt problems, they sometimes
think that divorce is their only way out. If this is happening to you
and you still love your spouse, the marriage is not hopeless.
Do you really want your spouse out or your life or do you want to
improve your marriage with your spouse? One of the questions to ask
before getting a divorce is asking yourself if you still see yourself
living with your spouse when things get better. When the conflict in
your marriage or things in your marriage can change or improve, do you
see yourself still living with your spouse or you feel much better
living a life without your spouse? Envisioning your life with or without
your spouse in the future can be very helpful in coming up with a
decision that can have a great impact on your entire life.
Have you exhausted all possible ways and fully utilized all available
help to make the relationship work? It is hard to live a life with
regrets and “what ifs” so one of the questions to ask before getting a
divorce is “Have you given it your all and tried every possible way to
save your marriage?” Have you sought and fully utilized all available
help? Failing to save your marriage through marriage counselling under
one therapist does not necessarily mean that the marriage has to end.
Have you tried finding another therapist before giving up on your
marriage?
Are you mentally and emotionally ready for divorce? Divorce is a
painful process. Although no one truly knows how painful the process is
unless you’ve experienced going through it, still you have to gauge
yourself and your character if you have the guts and the heart to go
through this painful process. Are you ready mentally and emotionally to
let go of all your emotional attachments to your spouse? Are you ready
to give up your family or the dream of having an intact happy family?
Are you prepared for the consequences of divorce?
Are you financially ready for divorce? Divorce is a financially
draining process. The financial aspect of divorce is not only during the
process of divorce but also after the divorce. One of the questions to
ask before getting a divorce is, “Are you financially able to support
your divorce process and be able to live and support yourself after the
divorce?” Couples who are suffering from financial woes in their
marriage and thinking divorce is the only way out may find themselves
suffering more financially because they weren’t prepared financially for
divorce.
The greatest dilemma when couples are in the verge of divorce is that
they are pressured to make the right decision because it is a decision
that can change their lives forever and can have a lasting impact on the
lives of their children. Is getting a divorce the right thing to do?
Separation is not always the right decision and there is no guarantee
that you are making the right decision. But whatever you decide, what is
important is that you are making a decision not out of anger or
negative emotions.
Your decision is not only for your own good but you
are also considering the welfare of your spouse and your children. Ask
yourself if it is good for us? Instead of just asking is it good for me?
If you are certain that you do not want a divorce and you want to work on your marriage visit Save My Marriage Today