Marriage is not an easy ride and it is often shaken by problems and
trials. One of the hardest trials is when your marriage is losing its
spark and getting dull. Couples in a stale or boring marriage may start
to get confused if the relationship is still worth keeping and may end
up separating if they failed to bring the spark back in their
relationship. If your marriage is getting stale, you need to know how to
bring back the spark in your marriage to save your troubled
relationship.
When couples are caught up in the increased responsibilities of
raising kids and climbing the career ladder, the marriage often suffer.
Couples tend to focus more on their daily responsibilities and end up
doing their own thing for the family and neglected their needs as
couples. They are trapped in a routine of married life and this makes
the relationship boring and lifeless. While raising your kids well and
securing a stable career are good things, you also need to focus on your
relationship to make your marriage last.
So how to bring back the spark in your marriage? You do not have to
struggle to restore the spark that once filled your relationship, the
following tips can be helpful to bring back the spark in your marriage.
Reminisce with your spouse. Bringing back old
memories will remind you and your spouse on how much you love each
other. Revisit the place where you first met or where you got engaged.
Watch your wedding videos and look at your old photos together to
remind you how happy you felt when you said “I do” to each other and
realize that losing the spark in your marriage is just a phase that you
both need to survive.
Appreciate your spouse more. We all need to be
appreciated even with the little things we do every day. Appreciation is
a validation that your spouse is doing meaningful things for the
family. If we are often neglected and ignored, we get a negative feeling
that our efforts are worthless and we get less encouragement to
continue with the relationship. Sometimes we are quick to give
criticisms and slow in giving praise. Couples have the wrong notion
that appreciation is only given to extraordinary achievements or if a
spouse did something great beyond his or her responsibilities. This is
the very reason why some marriages become stale and boring. They become
like robots who just do things for the family and eventually feel
nothing because they are not appreciated. Praise your spouse for
working hard for the family, for being a good parent and for being a
good spouse. Make it a point to notice and praise even the little things
your spouse do every day. Even a simple hug, kiss and saying thank you
as a sign of appreciation could make your marriage more romantic and
exciting. Your relationship will get better and it will be easier to
bring back the spark in your marriage if you will praise your spouse
more.
Surprise your spouse even if there is no special occasion.
Make his or her ordinary day extraordinary by giving surprises. We
usually remember and give gifts on special occasions like anniversaries
and birthdays but if you want to bring back the spark in your marriage,
give small gifts on ordinary days and make your spouse feel special even
if there is no special occasion. Your spouse will feel more loved
making the relationship alive.
Give your spouse a day-off. If your wife is usually
tied at home with her daily chores, do the chores for her and let her
have a day-off and spend a day to do the things she want to do for
herself. If your husband always drive for you and the kids, give him a
day-off and allow him to enjoy once in a while with his buddies or male
friends. Everyone needs a break once in a while not to be burn-out. If
you want to bring back the spark in your marriage, it is important to
give your spouse the time to recharge his or her energies.
Do not make small things a big deal. Do not carry
grudges and do not allow small issues spoil your daily relationship with
your spouse. It could be tiring to live in a marriage where issues
arise after another issue. Make your marriage a pleasant environment and
avoid grudges as much as possible. Make a list of the things that can
be tolerated and things that needs to be compromised to avoid conflicts.
Create new memories. Make it a point to travel and
create hobbies that you can do together to create new memories and spend
more time together. Relationships will become stale without new
memories and experiences. Step out of your daily routine and explore
together things that you want to experience for a change, it maybe
bungee jumping, mountaineering or it may be as simple as going to
museums to appreciate different works of art or try a new restaurant
every week to experience something different each week. Be adventurous
and share new experiences to bring back the spark in your marriage.
Daily conversation. Spend quality time every day to
talk about your individual feelings, hurt, frustrations and what you
want with each other. Miscommunications or misunderstandings can be
avoided if you check in with one another every single day. Regular
conversation also strengthens your bond with each other. If regular
conversation is not a common practice in your marriage, it is not too
late to start now. Set aside a few minutes every day to sit down
together to have a good conversation. It may be over coffee or after you
tucked your kids in bed. You can also plan a date night or lunch out
once a week to have more time to talk to each other. Make it a point to
converse every day with your spouse despite the overwhelming demands of
married life if you really want to bring back the spark in your
marriage.
Say “I love you” more often to your spouse. It is a
common mistake to just assume that your spouse already knows that you
are in love with him or her and you do not have to say it in words.
Spouses still want to hear those words. Aside from verbal words, there
are also other ways to say “I love you” to your spouse like writing a
love letter or sending personal love messages to your spouse though text
messaging. If you really want to bring back the spark in your
marriage, you have to verbalize your feelings of love to your spouse.
Losing the spark in your marriage is not the end of the relationship
because there are ways to re-ignite the spark and make your relationship
alive again. To save your troubled marriage visit Your Marriage Savior System
